oh mann~ i just realized that i have not blogged online .. for the past.. however many days. No, actually, that was a partial lie.. i DID realize... i just didnt know that it was for so long.. haha. wow. lammee.. =.=

Anyhow.. HMMS... the past few months have been quite UN-eventful/boring/slow-paced.. ofc, there are definately the few days where i go out, have fun, and blehblehbleh.. no not literally, but k, i hope you understand what i mean... xD! Generally speaking, my life has been.... very... "repetitive"? you know.. like, the usualy. wake up, school, hwk, sleep, dinner, yeah ? prettyy much right... i guess so. And through looking back at all this.. i can not exactly pinpoint the exact reason to all of this. its just weird... even talking to some of my friends, ive been so lifeless... and ugh. so sad=( im such a horrible friend.. i dont kno how to cheer ppl up when theyre down, at times, i dont know how to continue a conversation, and personally... i hate leaving things like that so open-ended. often times, i want to say something, but i dont kno which words to use, and what to say... and this hasnt happen.. just once. its been quite consistent for the past few months, to ierno... maybe ALL my friends, whether they notice or not...idk, but its noticable to me. : and i apologize to everyone that i might've indirectly ignored, or have been a bit cold to them lately.. well, after thinking to myself and venting towards a few non-living objects... xD i think im better now.. haha. trying to think positive, and look happy, .... : DDDDD !!

hm, but life goes on right. so today was another sunday... today, i was determined to pay attention, and stay awake... in both sunday school and sunday sermon.. but after unconsciously sleeping at 4am the night before, i found that it was quite impossible, sunday school was not too bad... cuz i have people bside to give me that nudge once in a while... and i guess i did have my sugar in the morning..xD However, that did not last long, and as we proceeded to service, i looked at the bulletin and realized i was doing overhead... which also means... i was gonna be sitting in the front, right in front of my pastor.... this was terrible!! As much as i had tried to stay awake, it didnt happen... i was trying to hide behind the computer.. but yea. didnt work out so well... kinda hard to say.. "hope he didnt see me" considering that i was sitting in the front.. xD OH WELLS. so that eventually ended.. and like we usually do at redeemer on the third week, there's bball after.. i dont play with them but sometimes i hang around cuz my mom is at prayer meeting. Today was a bit different though. without having anything planned... i ended up going to lunch with LK, JH, and my pastor... seems pretty normal right? like having lunch with 3 ppl from church... quite normal. but no, not this lunch. it's probably the awkwardest/weirdest group of ppl i could ever ever EVER go with.. because... i guess you can say.. i havent always..."liked" these ppl.. UGH. in my mind on the way going there.. all i was thinking was.. oh man, its gonna be weird.. why did i come... ah, wheres gor.. =(. Upon sitting at the table, there was soo soo soo many awkward silences. and i hope i dont ever ever have to do that again. Not with only the four of us at least.....

Coming home after that it was quite chill.. watched some tv, went on the comp, and realized... "OH CRAP! i think i have an eng assignment due tmr" when this had crossed my mind, i went downstairs pulled out my english binder, looked at the asgnmnt sheet and decided.. nope, i am not gonna finish this by tmr, compromised with my laziness, looked at my comp, and came to the conclusion that im probably gonna skip.. or go early to school and talk to my teacher.. shes usually lenient towards these things..heh. such a slacker... K, after checking some e-mails and what not i was bored and tired and went to take a nap. I later found out that my nap lasted for 4 1/2 hours.. i slept at 6 and woke up at 10 30. actually.. my dad woke me up to tell me to eat dinner. When he woke me up. i was thinking.... WHAT THE HECK? ITS MORNING ALREADY? but. i looked out my window and it was still dark, so i was like.. huh? why did my dad wake me up at the middle of the night. but i looked at my phone, and i was like...=.= its 10 30, i guess i was just SOO tired, and so into my sleep and my bed is so compfy.. that i guess i lost track of time. wow, ive never done tat before.. haha. now i'll probably be up for a while.. or sleep again... since ive been losing so much sleep. xD

yea, i think im gonna do that now... haha. k.bye :D